Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Agenda
Kids. I’ve read a lot of really stupid things in my lifetime. (Usually from the media.) I’ve slapped my forehead so many times that I am close to having a permanent palm print there. My eyeballs have damn near rolled themselves out of their sockets. I’ve worked with, around and for idiotic people who have nothing going on behind their eyes...vacancy, vacancy, vacancy is all that flashes.
But I have to tell you, this is the dumbest shit I have ever read in my entire life, ever. Dumber than PETA. Dumber than anything said on Moron.org. Dumber than every time St. Hope and Change opens his mouth. This is, bar none, the most blindingly stupid pile of words ever strung together:
Fat People Are The Cause Of Global Warming.
Scientists warned that the increase in big-eaters means more food production — a major cause of CO2 gas emissions warming the planet.
That horrid, HORRID CO2 that plants use to survive. Plants that give off oxygen for us to breathe. I’ve gone over this before, I’m NOT teaching anyone again.
Overweight people are also more likely to drive, adding to environmental damage.
Oh, really? REALLY? Have they ever visited Southern California? Most of those people have sucked out every last ounce of fat they ever had and those pricks STILL drive everywhere. Driving your ass around all day has NOTHING to do with your weight. Laziness-it’s not just for fat people. Case in point: I personally know people who live no more than 100 yards from the backdoor of their work and they DRIVE to work from their homes. ONE of them is fat. The rest are just L-A-Z-Y. Assholes.
Dr Phil Edwards, of the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, said: “Moving about in a heavy body is like driving in a gas guzzler.”
That doesn’t even make sense. If the “gas guzzler” was empty all the time it would mean that the person’s metabolism was high. People with high metabolism are NOT fat.
Each fat person is said to be responsible for emitting a tonne more of climate-warming carbon dioxide per year than a thin one. It means an extra BILLION TONNES of CO2 a year is created, according to World Health Organisation estimates of overweight people.
Did ANYONE pay attention in 5th grade science? Anyone? Bueller?
The scientists say providing extra grub for them to guzzle adds to carbon emissions that heat up the world, melting polar ice caps, raising sea levels and killing rain forests.
What a bunch of snobbish, cock sucking assholes. Could they be any more obvious in their contempt for anyone with extra weight or meat on their bones? ‘grub for them to guzzle’??? You expect me to believe this is an authentic scientific report with words like “grub for them to guzzle”? And for the last MOTHER FUCKING TIME, this global warming hype is unproven horseshit. This is made up crap by people who want to rob you blind by enticing you to purchase carbon footprints to satisfy your guilt for having the audacity to live in these modern times as well as people who have an agenda towards those they view as “inconvenient” to society. (All that means is, “they don’t like it so they want to get rid of it.” This goes for fat people, old people, sick people, people with different skin colors, people with certain deformities or disabilities....the list is endless. And every time I read or hear of something like this, my first thought goes to, “Wow, this is the sort of thing Hitler thought.” ) Fat people kill rain forests. What, are they eating the rain forests? What is in the rain forest? Would that be....WOOD!? And who uses wood? Oh, I don’t know, every fucking person on the planet! But it’s because of the fat people that the rain forest is being destroyed. Not greed! No!
Dr Phil Edwards said: “Food production accounts for about one fifth of greenhouse gases.
“We need to do a lot more to reverse the global trend towards fatness. It is a key factor in the battle to reduce carbon emissions and slow climate change.
“It is time we took account of the amount we are eating.
What comes after this? A food diary, checked daily by the government who will punish you if you ate more than they stated you were allowed to eat. Good God it reminds me of my dictator mother. If you were hungry after 6pm, TOUGH SHIT! Thirsty? SUFFER! You were not allowed to have anything to eat or drink for the rest of the night once dinner was over. That was it. The end. Do you know what this causes? Rebellion. Are you sure you want a bunch of angry, hungry fatties rebelling against you elitist prickish snots?
“This is about over-consumption by the wealthy countries. And the world demand for meat is increasing to match that of Britain and America.
“It is also much easier to get in your car and pick up a pint of milk than to take a walk.”
Do they not know a damn thing about history? In the olden days, way back when, people wanted their brides or grooms to be fat because it showed wealth. DER! If you were thin, it meant your family had no money. Who wants to marry some sickly, thin, poor waif? No one! Thin was considered disgusting in those days. Then we needed meat on our bones so we could survive as we made our way across this great country of ours to settle. Can you plow a fucking field, erect a cabin and tend to the livestock if you weight a buck o’ five? NO! You need muscle to do the work and you need the fucking FAT to keep warm during the harsh winters. You need something between the skin and the bones to LIVE. Idiots.
And of course it’s easier to get in my car and pick up some milk than take a walk. I would have to walk 6 fucking miles to get that milk and six miles back. If you live in town? No, it’s NOT easier but it IS easier when you have more than one bag of groceries to carry home.
Dr Edwards went on: “We are not just pointing the finger at fat people. All populations are getting fatter and it has an impact on the environment.
What? Does this idiot even pay attention to what he says? “We are not just blaming fat people, a lot of people are getting fat.” Which means, you are blaming ONLY fat people, douchebag. That would have made much more sense if he had said something like, “We are not just blaming fat people, a lot of people are lazy.”
“UK health surveys estimate fatness has increased from an average body mass index of 26 to 27 in the last ten years. “That’s equivalent to about half a stone for every person.”
Ok, I had to look up what the fuck, “half a stone” is. A stone is 14 pounds so half a stone is 7 pounds. People have gained 7 pounds in the last 10 years. OH MY GOD! I’m surprised the Earth hasn’t been crushed beneath our weight. Are they kidding? Most people gain weight as they get older! DUH, DUH, DUH!!!!! Did they bother to discuss if they were weighing the same people, a certain age group or everyone overall? I guarandamntee you I weigh 7 pounds more than I did when I was in my 20s!!!! And I sure as fuck weighed 7 pounds more then than when I was in my teens! Seven whole pounds in 10 years. That’s not bad, actually considering many girls gain 40 fucking pounds in their Freshman year of college! OH! It’s the freshman girls who are the cause of global warming! Put down that pizza, bitch! You’re killing the planet!
Anyone with a BMI above 25 is overweight, while more than 30 is obese.
A staggering 40 per cent of Americans are obese, among 300 million worldwide.
That means that 60% of Americans are NOT. But let’s not focus on that, NO, let’s talk about 40 whole percent! Not even half, you tool sheds. As of 2008, the total worldwide population was 6,710,029,070. That is 6.7 BILLION people. Must I do this math for you?
Australian Professor Paul Zimmet predicted a disastrous obesity pandemic back in 2006.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ok, that is funny. There are 6.7 BILLION people on the planet and 300 million are estimated to be obese worldwide. It’s a pandemic!!!!
And Oxfam warned yesterday that the number of people hit by climate-related disasters will soar by more than half in the next six years to 375million.
The impact of more storms, floods and droughts could overwhelm aid organisations.
So, when a hurricane hits S. Florida in the future, now I know who to blame. It’s the fatties fault that we have hurricanes, floods, ice storms and droughts. And here I thought it was all George Bush’s fault.
Sun doctor Carol Cooper said last night: “I’m not sure which came first, people getting fat and driving or the other way around. It is true fat people eat more food than average.
Oh my God, lady. Read your history. PLEASE! And it is not always true that fat people eat more. I’ve known a LOT of thin people who eat WAY more than any fat person I’ve known. WAAAAAY more. Some people have higher metabolisms. Some people, say, pro athletes, eat a shit load more food than fat people. So, no, bitch, fat people do not always eat more than average. And some people are genetically predisposed to be bigger than others.
True story: Remember how I said I didn’t get to eat after 6pm when I was growing up? The fact is, it wasn’t just after 6pm. The 6pm thing meant I had to wait 13 and a half hours before I could eat again. The fact IS, I didn’t get enough to eat all day long because I was not allowed to eat very much. Ok, so I was THIN. I used to lull myself to sleep at night thinking about how great it would be when I was an adult and could have a fridge with food in it that I could EAT! I shit you not. I would fantasize about that. In fact, when I look back on it now, the very fact that I was always so fucking tired had a LOT to do with the fact that I wasn’t getting enough to eat. I couldn’t pay attention in class, I had a notebook that was filled with little notes to my friend and they all started off the same way,"I’m so tired!!!!” I fell asleep in class a lot. My grades suffered. It wasn’t that I didn’t get enough sleep. I had to go to bed early. I got plenty of sleep. I also ate healthy when I was allowed to eat. I just didn’t get ENOUGH food. I see photos of me then, now and I look like a ghost. My skin was pale and my cheeks were gaunt. My shoulders sloped off...I looked horrible. But hey! I was thin! I graduated high school at 115 pounds.
Fast forward to my military days: I’m young, still, I’m in the best physical shape of my life and I ended up gaining weight. Not only because I was actually allowed to eat but I gained a lot in muscle. I had gained in size, (my shoulders got wider from all the pushups, they no longer sloped down, my face filled out and I no longer looked gaunt), and I gained weight on the scale because of the muscle. And do you know, that even though I was in the best physical shape ever, I was considered overweight? Yes. But I wasn’t fat at all. I was 5’4 and I weighed 124 pounds, most of it muscle. This was healthy. This was a healthy weight and I even looked better. So, by allowing me to eat like a normal person actually made me bigger than what these fuckheads would like me to be. So, I had only gained 9 pounds, (just over half a stone) but according to these assholes, I was destroying the planet.
“A few obese people have a hormone problem, although most simply don’t use enough calories and eat too many. But making them feel guilty antagonises them and may not help.”
What a whore. After what she just said, now she says this? You’ve gone and already antagonized them, twit. Little late now, thanks for playing, you lose.
So there you have it, kids. Fat people are destroying the world. Greed, corruption, idiocy and laziness have nothing to do with it. It’s all the fault of the fat people. Don’t worry, though, we’ll soon have them placed in their re-education camps and if they continue to be a blight on society, we’ll just destroy them. And when we’re done with them? We’re coming after you for whatever fault you have that we don’t like.
Hey, you there, you have naturally curly hair? We’re coming after you because you’re destroying the ozone layer and you cause sun spots! How dare you exist.
