Friday, March 06, 2009
Cover Your Damn Mouth!
I have no energy to write about the 8.1% unemployment rate or the fact that the DOW has dropped 20.4% since Inauguration Day making it the biggest post inaugural drop for any administration in 90 years, (Bloomberg). I don’t have the energy right now to shake my head in disgust at all those morons who voted for this fool because they couldn’t see past their BDS rage. Idiots. I’m exhausted.
I only have the energy to whine about how I’m sick and to tell people, yet again, why it is so important to cover your fucking mouths and noses when you cough and/or sneeze. Yes, I work around a lot of people all day long from all over the world but I’m also very clean. I am constantly washing my hands and I don’t touch doorknobs or things in the bathroom because I have witnessed, first hand, just how disgusting human beings can be. Are.
I believe I have written this before but I’m going to write it again because apparently, some people in this world do not have a clue. You foul, piles of foul filth!
Back in 8th grade Science, the instructor had us cough in to petri dishes. My lab partner was sick at the time and overall a pretty unhealthy person to begin with. I, on the other hand, was the pinnacle of health. (That comes from being around parents who do not smoke, drink or allow any kind of good food in the house, nay, we had things like granola bars for a snack. And bananas for dessert in our packed lunches. Whee.) I was extremely active in sports and was not sick.
My lab partner coughed in to her dish, I coughed in to mine. Whatever fake ass cough I could come up with. Then we incubated these dishes for two weeks. At the end of two weeks, (which is just about the same amount of time it takes for cold and flu and whatever else disgusting virus to incubate in the human system), we pulled our dishes out of the incubator to examine.
As you may guess, mine didn’t really have anything in it. Nonetheless, because I forced some fake cough, meaning some sort of something, (spittle?), flew through the air and landed in the dish, I had a little bit of growth on the dish. Just goes to show you that even if you are coughing simply because your throat is dry, you should still COVER YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!
My lab partner? Oh Lord! It was like botulism central. It was a fucking village...hell, a thriving metropolis of bacteria. There were condos, townhomes, duplexes of phlegm looking substance on top of phlegm looking substance. It was one of the most vile things I’ve ever seen in real life. The entire petri dish was covered in what looked like gigantic globs of snot, criss crossed, lumped and stuck together, building on any available surface, 10 times over. It was horrifying.
And this is what you assholes pass on to other humans when you are sick and you cough openly, without covering your mouths. Hell, again, you don’t even have to be sick to pass something on to the other person who is unfortunate enough to be in your firing range.
Oh and by the way, coughing in to your hand, that doesn’t cut it. Because when you cough in to your hand, you have that shit living on your hand and then you go and grab a door knob or my keyboard or mouse or something on my desk, “May I borrow this pencil?” Gross, bitch, you just keep it, mmkay? and you pass it on to that object you just touched. Cough in to your sleeve or use a damn Kleenex. And wash your fricken hands!
What IS IT with you people not washing your hands? You don’t wash your hands before you eat, before you prepare food, after you use the bathroom, after you’ve sneezed, coughed and hurled all kinds of crap in your palms...seriously, what is your deal?
You know that Norwalk Virus issue that you hear about on cruise lines all the time? Well, as you know, if you’ve been reading here for some time, I used to work for a couple of different cruise lines and I’m going to tell you a secret: That shit comes because people are in enclosed spaces and someone out there isn’t washing their fucking hands. They then make their way to the banquet and slop that filth all over the hand rail or the elevator buttons or the tongs used to pick up food, whathaveyou. And then some poor innocent person goes and grabs those tongs, passing it on to some other public item until it’s spread all over the ship.
The reason cruise lines get in to the papers about it all the time is because again, these people are in an enclosed space for a longer period of time than most people but you can find this virus in schools and malls and other public places where you have a large amount of people in a small space.
I understand people don’t have OCD like maybe I do...some people say I do but I don’t think I do, I just like to be clean and I think about these things but it isn’t that hard to do these two simple things:
Cover your fucking nose/mouth when you sneeze/cough.
Wash your damn hands.
Oh, and if that doesn’t help you think about it, then maybe this will:
The next time you are at the gas station pumping gas in to your car, I want you to think about this. That dude who just went in to the bathroom and then came out and pumped his gas using the nozzle that you are using now? Guess what? He didn’t wash his hands and you are touching his penis by proxy.
