Sunday, November 30, 2003
I'm Famous and Adored
It has become apparent that my birth certificate is false and that I have been lied to for all these years. I was not born in Charleston, SC afterall, rather, I’m from the stunning and beautiful, (albeit hobo hating) country known as: Reynoldssia.
I was also such an amazing gifted, talented and fierce fighting citizen, respected by my peers and a pillar in the community, a saint perhaps, that a city was named after me.
(click for bigger image...do I really need to say that?)
The thriving metropolis known as Sereniti (That’s the proper Reynoldssian spelling), which I now rightly rule over, is just a little over 800km to the east and north of the capital city, Mischaw. Please come visit, bring your tourist dollars and make sure you’ve read up on all the local customs and laws of Sereniti City. There are harsh punishments for those who are ignorant to the ways of the Serenitiites. Let’s just say that previous violaters have found themselves chained to trees out in the dark, soul less forests, starving to death during our harsh, cold, unforgiving winters. Or, if I’m feeling generous, the city feeds any ignorant, foul, rude, selfish and all screeching Moonbats to the three headed dragon that resides in the city center. We then send the half eaten bones back to the DNC for kicks.
Don’t forget to bring your camera and enjoy your free, daily Reynoldssian style breakfast brought to your hotel room in the morning no later than 7. Enjoy your visit!
