1) Colors:  Dark backgrounds kill our eyes.  This also goes for those “funky” retro 60’s colors, like green on red or pink on blue or whatever cutesy, cool, artsy-fartsy crap people are using for backgrounds and text these days.  When I see blogs like this, I immediately click off because I simply do not care how brilliant your writing is, I will not succumb to eyestrain and headaches to read your words.  Nothing wrong with a little color but please recognize that you won’t be getting a lot of readers who will stick around.  Any readers you have now will ultimately stop visiting unless you start blogging in braille.

2) Content:  I’ve already discussed the plethora of mommy blogs out there where the author posts photo after photo of their kids in so called cute poses...G-d please stop...but I’m also so seriously not interested in your daily t.v. line-up either. I’ve come across several blogs where all they talk about is what they watched on television the night before and analyzed every character.  The subjects are usually in Reality shows so allow me to let you in on a little secret:  Most Reality shows are not all that real.  There is a lot going on behind the scenes and the outcome isn’t necessarily how it would have naturally happened.  Sorry to burst your bubble.  The producers are running the show and they will be deciding who wins, plain and simple.  There is no mystery nor suspense and really all these shows are is an open window into how bitchy some people can truly be.  Therefore I find these blogs fantastically boring and frankly, very sad. 

Also, if you are going to post a news story on your blog, how about a little opinion from yourself?  Cutting and pasting a news story into your blog and calling it a day does not a blog make.  Tell us what you think about the story.  Give us more information.  Do some research and dispute what the journalist has written, do something for crying out loud but do not copy a story and leave it at that.

Granted there are many blogs out there with topics I’m not in the least bit interested in but it doesn’t mean it’s a bad blog, it just means I’m not interested in all the cheats you found for Halo or tech talk or restaurant critiquing.  I’m not saying the blog has to be something I like to be good, I’m saying try to have substance more often than not.  And every little move you have made since you dragged yourself out of bed this morning is not substance...unless something incredible happened along the way.  Unfortunately, there are many people who like to tell us what time they had coffee, when they went to work, who they talked to at work, what they then had for lunch, where they got their car washed, what they ate for dinner and how many online games they played that night.  Guess what?  Boring ass shit.

I personally know that we can’t be extraordinarily interesting at all times as anyone who’s read here for awhile knows that sometimes I can’t think of a damn thing to say because not a damn thing has happened and not a damn thing inspires me to write but I try to have some sort of quality in my posts.  The times I write really bad posts are when I’ve been staring at a blank screen, crushed by writer’s block and I’ll write about anything to kill it.  (See yesterday’s post for a fine example.)

Of course there will always be disagreements between those on the Left and those on the Right and more often than not, a reader from one party will come across a blog from the opposite party and will instantly declare it rubbish...which is to be expected but is really stupid to judge solely on how someone votes.  There are quite a few people over there on my blogroll who voted differently from me but it’s the other stuff in their blogs that I like.  Some of those bloggers are rather gifted. 

Regardless, if you are a total fucking lunatic who is not happy unless you have a conspiracy theory or two tucked away in the recesses of your brain, take a hint from those who have stopped by and taken the time to comment.  Chances are it is not the entire country that is brainwashed and needs saving.  Maybe, just maybe you are the one who has gone off the deep end and needs to take a step back.  The world is not out to get you and it may be time to put away the MC 900 Ft Jesus album and come back to reality.

3) Layout:  Doesn’t anyone check their layout in more than one browser anymore?  There are some people out there whose blog I really wish I could read but your *&$#@! margins and sidebars are overlapping your text and just as with complaint #1, I’m not going to give myself an aneurysm trying to view your site.  Ask your friends to send you a screen shot from their system and make the appropriate adjustments.  It is difficult sometimes to get a page to sit properly in every single browser and screen resolution out there but look at your referral logs and see what is the most popular browser and operating system and use that as your guide.

4) Writing Styles:  I am so very unimpressed with your wanna-be, I’m so cool, haxor speak.  I have just recently decided to tolerate “W00t”, (which still drives me fucking crazy by the way), but writing about what a great $it3 you have is not only irritating, it makes you look like a moron.  Also, if you are trying to convince me of how intelligent you are, please learn to spell simple words like, “encircle” and “great”.  It is not “incircle” and it is not “grate” in the context you are using the word.  Also, “lose” and “loose”....oy VEY!  If you are talking about something that can be lost, it’s spelled, “lose”.  If you are talking about something not fitting right, it’s “loose”.  Please, for the love of all that is good in this world will you PLEASE learn how to spell “lose”.  Finally, please, finish the sentence or, my favorite, don’t forget the verb!

There are many more hints I could give to novice bloggers or just plain bad bloggers but these four basic steps will make a huge difference in your readership.  And for those of you who state that you don’t care about readership, why are you on the internet then?

I have been lucky enough to have been surrounded by some quality blogs the entire time I’ve even known about blogs and some are far better than mine, some are about the same as mine and some are not as good as mine.  But knowing that there are so many awful blogs and online journals out there makes me realize that while I may not be “on” every day with new and exciting things to talk about, this blog really isn’t all that bad afterall.  I guess the hundreds of readers I get everyday probably agree...seeing as you keep coming back for more.  So, from here on out, I’m not going to worry about it and I’ve decided I’m not going to run off and start a new one under a different name in an effort to save face because even though some of my posts are....well, not up to par, I know I’ve entertained a couple of people along the way.