Tuesday, May 18, 2004
Barbie The Nazi Punk
Well, well, well. Look what we have here:
Every little liberal moonbat boy from San Francisco to Seattle, from Boston to Austin will be screaming for one of these. They’ll sit in their darkened rooms, sipping on Kool-Aid, tin foil hat perched upon their heads and stroke NaziBarbie’s hair. They’ll speak to their dolls in soothing voices, seeking answers to why the big, bad meanies on the Right never give in to their tempter tantrums. They’ll cry, they’ll laugh, they’ll share special moments with their NaziBarbie. She’ll become their therapist and best friend when the cruel, cruel world and all the evil Amerikkkans treat them badly.
They’ll seek solace, curl up on their beds, arms wrapped around their NaziBarbie, who will have its own NaziPillow and Naziblanket and they’ll release their flood of tears that they are so misunderstood.
But NaziBarbie understands them. She’s their rock. She’s their comfort. NaziBarbie accepts them just the way they are. At long last, the moonbat brigade has found someone, something that will listen to them. They love their NaziBarbie.
And I can’t wait for one of them to leave their precious doll lying around. I will dangle her from a ceiling fan set at high with a note hung around her neck. The moonbats will watch her spin around and around and try to read a word with each pass she makes:
“I....
hate....
you....
signed....
NaziBar....
NaziBarbie....”
And the little moonbats will collaspse to the floor, wailing. Their best friend hates them so much, it committed dollicide. Their world will shatter all around them. They’ll sit in the corner, sucking their thumb for weeks and will be inconsolable.
Every once in awhile, they will hear a villianous laugh, “muhahahahahha”, which will cause them to snap and be admitted to the insane asylum. And that is precisely where they belong.
My work here is done.
[thanks to Jim K for the link]
[update] The day I can enrage a moonbat with mere words on a computer screen is a beautiful and wonderful day for me.
To my Moonbat Fan:
Thanks for visiting! Glad ya liked the place! I understand that “facts” are a difficult concept for your kind so it surprises me not when you have zero sense of humor either. That’s okay, maybe you woke up on the wrong side of the bong this morning...but I did want to give you a headstart on your vocabulary lesson. If you go look up the word, “hypocrisy”, in the dictionary and then read your post, you’ll see how hilarious your writing truly is. Oh! And I know it caused you great concern to actually link to this post and send traffic my way but don’t worry, your two readers won’t eat up hardly any bandwidth. In fact, no one will even notice they were here.
Anyway, please come back. You are very funny and I had a great laugh over your post. Oh, why did I remove the trackback? You convinced me that it might be a bad idea to send any traffic back and forth and besides, I’m not sure you could handle some of the cold, hard reality my readers would give you. See? And you say all right wingers are racist and Orwellian. Tsk! You kid us so. Silly moonbat. Now go on, shoo, I have a blog to run child.
