Monday, June 01, 2009
Finally
After two years working here and asking and asking and asking and always getting some lame ass bullshit excuse, I finally got some time off.
The very first thing people ask is, “Where are you going?”
Why the hell do I need to go anywhere? All I want to do is sleep and be left the fuck alone. I just want a break from the stupid questions I receive all day long, the pissy little attitudes, the back stabbing, gossiping, rumors and the inane conversations my drugged out co-workers have all day long.
In other words, I want to remember what life is like in the real world.
I MAY go visit St. Augustine but I may not. I may just fucking chill out for the 9 days I have off and do absolutely nothing. I live in a vacation spot. I’m about sick to death of tourists. I don’t need any more socialization at this point.
What I need is some peace and quiet and sleep. What I need is to just fuck around and goof off all day long. Stay up way too late at night on the computer, sleep in way too late during the day. Stay out of the boiling hot sun.
This is a mental vacation. I’m mentally exhausted and the very last thing I want to do is go out in to the world, (namely traffic), and deal with ignorant fuckwads.
On my last day of work before the vacation, I went to the store and stocked up on everything I might need so that I don’t have to leave the confines of my house. I have enough to entertain me here. I have the computer/internet, satellite t.v. in which I can use to watch horrible reality shows, I will actually have energy to use my Wii and WiiFit now because I won’t be drained from the boiling hot sun and stupid tourist questions, (not sure if I mentioned that yet) and my retarded, douche bag co-workers, (did I mention them yet? They are especially tiring.) I’ll have the energy to actually do a good cleaning instead of a quick clean. I’ll have energy to spend time with the cats. I will have time to pick up a book and read it instead of getting one paragraph in before I fall asleep only to wake up some hours later with the book plastered to my cheek.
In other words, this vacation, the first vacation I’ve had in two and a half years, I intend on doing absolutely nothing interesting to anyone else at all. I am not going to jet off somewhere just so I have a good story to share with the co-workers who will undoubtedly ask, “Where did you go? What did you do?”
God, assholes, we fucking hate each other. Why are you so interested in what I do with my personal time that has no effect on you whatsoever? It does not concern you, so why do you care? For you to judge how well you think I spent my vacation? Yeah, look, I got done with those, “What I Did On My Vacation” reports in grade school, ok?
None of your fucking business what the hell I do. Go smoke another joint and guzzle another beer. Hey, pop a pill or two while you’re at it and attack the shit out of each other while I’m gone. Actually, I’m probably not going to be gone long enough for that to happen. They’ll spend the next 9 days trash talking me while I’m not around. I can almost guarantee that shit. If I were gone longer, they would eventually tire of that and start attacking each other since I’m not there to be their little punching bag but I don’t think 9 days is long enough.
Maybe it is. Hopefully it is. I would love nothing more than to return and hear that the monkeys turned on each other in my absence.
Now, this sounds like a self important post; as if I’m so fucking important that they will all talk about me. It’s not that. Not at all. I do nothing to these pricks. I mind my own business, do my job and go home. I don’t like getting involved in the petty ass arguments that go on there and let me tell you, we are talking some major pettiness. It’s amazing what makes grown men cry like little girls. The magnitude of bullshit around here is appalling.
Yes, I know, you have pieces of shit no matter where you work. There’s always at least one. I get that. This isn’t my first job nor do I have no other life experience. (Something my co-workers seem to forget. They all seem to believe life began at this place.) But, as bitchy as the bitchiest co-worker I’ve ever had has been, they pale in comparison to the infantile crappings my co-workers drop every day. The second in command told me, when I pointed this out, that I was welcome to work somewhere else. I know that, bitch. (I also know that she is one of the biggest culprits when it comes to gossip and rumors and she didn’t like being called out like that. Immature whore.) I know damn good and well that I don’t have to stay here. Der. However, I also know that I’m not going to let some whiny, snot nosed, crybaby co-worker run me out of a situation where the money is pretty decent. I have a goal and the hell if some fag ass abuser is going to push me away from that.
I know they’ve tried and continue to try. But I’m stronger than they are. I’ve been called WAY worse by better. I’ve had enough experience dealing with little shit nuggets like this. It’s just that this time there’s more of them. It’s annoying as all hell but little pieces of creamed shit will not steer me away from my goals. So suck it, bitches.
This 9 day staycation is going to rejuvenate me so that I can put up with the horseshit for a little while longer as I continue to save and accumulate. Eventually I WILL leave but not until I’m either fired or I’M ready.
That irritates them greatly. Which makes it all the more fun for me. Do you know how hilarious it is to know that your mere existence boils someone’s blood? Yep. I say that to myself everyday:
“The very fact that I live and breathe pisses you off. I need to do nothing more. I’ve already won.”
The people I work with, most don’t even have a high school diploma, (no you do not need to be smart to drive an airboat), do drugs or drink or both, a LOT, are stupid as shit and have no future. Most of them get pissed that I have an education. I don’t throw it in their face but I’m not going to dumb myself down to talk about farts and fucking just to make them feel better about themselves. Most of them are highly irritated that I’m a girl and doing the same job they are. They really, really don’t like the fact that a girl is doing the “man’s job” (according to them), and does it better than many of them. I’m not the best. Certainly not. But I do well. And it annoys the ever loving shit out of them. In fact, some of them accuse me of flashing all the tourists on my boat to make tips. Yah, that’s exactly what I do. It couldn’t possibly be due to the fact that I FUCKING know how to relate to people and make them laugh. It couldn’t be due to the fact that I’ve had years of experience in customer service that has taught me how to talk to people and not AT them. It couldn’t be due to the fact that I’m not a fucking asshole and don’t treat people like shit. It couldn’t be due to the fact that a little bit of acting experience can go a long way. (You just have to act like you enjoy them for 45 minutes and make them believe it.) No, it can’t have anything at all to do with any of that education and experience. It’s simply because I flash everyone on each tour. That’s how I make my money. See, that’s the only possible way any girl can make any money. I mean, we’re girls. We have no skills to speak of. We are all dumb. We have nothing intelligent to say. In fact, why don’t we just shut up and get in the kitchen to make them a sandwich and get them a beer.
There’s just no way I can be making any money off of any of my abilities. None at all. Because girls can’t do anything except cook, clean and fuck. Don’t be getting too big for your britches with your hoity toity education. And stop using big words to embarrass me. (Seriously, I don’t use big words. I just talk like a normal human being. I’m not a pretentious fuck. Let me give you an example of what they think is a big word: The alligator is much more docile than the crocodile. Docile. HOLY SHIT! I can’t believe she talks like that in front of us! Fucking know it all bitch! What the fuck does docile mean? I bet she looked it up to embarrass us. What the fuck does it mean, anyway? Bitch.) I think I’ve used that example before...I’m not sure if I actually wrote that out, thought of writing it out or never submitted the post....but if I repeat myself, well, what can you expect? I’m just a dumb girl. I should have just stopped writing 1000 words ago and flashed everyone instead. I mean, that’s all I’m good for.
Anyhoo, yes, I do intend on leaving one day. I will not work here forever. But now is not the time, bullshit wading or not. First of all, we have an ignorant fool in office who is destroying jobs left and right so now is not the time to be looking for a new job. Great time to buy a home, though. And, frankly, I want to milk this shit for all its worth while I have the strength to do it. At the very least, I want to do this another year. IF I can stomach it, I’ll do it a little longer than that. Honestly I’m not sure how much I can take after that much time but I want to make it at least that long. Then I’ll have a sizable chunk of savings and most of my stuff will be paid off. At that point, I should only owe on one thing but that one thing is an investment for me, really. Once my car is paid off and certain contracts are up and I’ve got a good amount in my savings, then I’ll start to look around at moving the hell away from here. Because this IS the place to get that done.
Then, when I know I can leave any old damn time I please, that’s the point I start telling these fuckwads a thing or two. Right now I pretty much keep my mouth shut because, again, I have a goal. Once I have reached that goal, there will be nothing to hold me back.
And frankly, my next job? I’d prefer to work from home, thankyouverymuch. Enough with the low self esteemed co-workers. I have some of the writing I can be doing, that gets some money to me but I need a good, full time job working from home. I think I’d be much happier, much more relaxed and more at peace. So, let me know if you know of any good, legit work at home jobs. LEGIT, people. Key word.
And now, I’m off to enjoy the rest of my vacation. I think I’ll begin by sleeping some more.
