Monday, December 10, 2007
Lazy
Really. I am so lazy sometimes. I’ve done some cool things lately and I’ve seen a movie that was cool and I’ve had interesting experiences and things to vent about but I either only think about writing them or I do write them and then, when finished, don’t feel like publishing them or I write them and they disappear because I timed out on my own damn site or I want to write but it requires I down load photos off my camera and all I want to do is sleep.
You know why? Because people are exhausting. My job itself is very easy and I’ve had my work load lighten up a little in the past two weeks...who knows if that will continue so I just try to enjoy it while I can and most of the job is actually fun but the people...my God the people that walk through those doors. They drain me. I would say for every boat load of people who are fun to talk to and drive around the Everglades and show them all sorts of things and flirt with them and make them laugh and really enjoy myself with them, there are 10 boats of people who act like they would rather be any place else but on that boat taking a tour to see wild life.
And if it’s not Mr. McGrumpy Pants and Mrs. Sourmouth Scowl, it’s the idiots who are so programmed by society anymore that they cannot think for themselves. It’s apparently impossible for them to form a coherent thought on their own without someone telling them how to think and which way to walk.
One thing I’ve noticed while going along in life is that we have so many damn signs for everything. Park here, don’t park here, open here, close here, do it this way, don’t do it that way, walk here, stand there, wait in this line, sign on that line, push this button, pull this lever....signs everywhere telling us what to do at almost any given moment. And there are two results that have come from this.
The first is, as I mentioned, people no longer are able to think for themselves. They cannot stand outside a store, look around, deduce where they might go to begin the process of obtaining entrance in to the park, conclude that water + parked air boats = this is where I get on for the tour...no. They will stand there with that deer in headlight look as I like to call it, staring, blankly. Eventually they decide to wander around aimlessly and after asking 56 different people who all give the same answer, they find their way to the counter and ask the exact same questions all over again.
Oh and is it just me or do those people who move their mouths while you talk irritate the shit out of you? What is that? What are you doing? Stop it!
We can give them the simple instructions, “here’s your ticket, your boat is leaving in ‘x’ minutes, you can go here to wait” but it does not compute. They will walk back out the store and ask those same 56 people the same damn questions they asked earlier and already have answers to because they are fucking idiots.
The second problem with so many signs is that now people don’t even read the signs. It’s pointless to put signs up anymore. You can have a huge 20x30 foot sign out front telling them what the name of the place is and they will still walk in and ask if this is that place. You can give them a sign with an arrow that points to the front door and says, “Airboat Information Inside” and they will still not know where to go. You can tell them that the bathroom is right around that corner and they will stand there, confused. They will then ask again and again where the bathroom is and then, I shit you not, they will walk back outside and look for the bathrooms behind the building.
And what is it with Europeans and flushing toilets? Why don’t they flush? I’ve lived in Europe...I didn’t notice a problem when I lived there but these people apparently have a fear of swirling water and whooshing noises because they? Do. Not. Flush.
I have witnessed customers reading the menu on the counter and then asking if we have a menu. No, I’m not making that up.
I have seen them bring items up to the counter, look right at the price tag and then hand the item over asking how much it costs. Um.....what?
I have had them stand right next to the boat and ask me where they go to get on the boat. Huh?
I have had them ask me, while looking at an alligator that I’m pointing out, where are the alligators. Well, that would be that alligator looking thing right there.
I have told them, before starting the tour, that they do not need to put their ear plugs in just yet. I will let them know when to put those in. They will put the damn ear plugs in anyway and then raise their hands to ask me to speak up because they can’t hear me. No shit?
I will be talking about saw grass, have a blade of it in my hands, showing them all about saw grass. They will be staring right at me, nodding. When I am done, they will ask me, “What kind of grass is that?”
I will show them, physically, how deep the water is and they will ask me, not 3 minutes later, “How deep is the water out here?”
Yes, I know, they aren’t paying attention. But it’s also stupidity. And there are a lot of stupid people in this world and I have to tell you kids, we have reason to fear. These people drive, they vote, they operate appliances in apartment buildings....ok, we need to fear for our future...immediate and otherwise because honestly? It’s frightening the level of stupidity that is out there. And there isn’t a sign in this world that will help them. They are zombies. They are brain dead.
Anyway, I need more sleep. Maybe later today I’ll write about some of my recent adventures, complete with photos. But right now, seriously, I need to rest and live in ignorant bliss for awhile, away from humans, in my little castle, alone, far away where they can’t touch me.
